Missing

Missing

🛣I looked at the world from the streets last night and felt like something big is missing.

🚍What if we were living forward bulldozing through life instead of outward growing through others sharing feelings, talent, love, kindness, passions, compassion, hobbies, experiences?

📽Why do we walk, run, or drive past each other not blinking twice, not saying a mere “hi” that might just make us see that:

🤸🏻‍♀️we aren’t actually the only ones who had a bad day, month or week;

🏋🏼‍♂️not the only ones with financial and mental health problems;

👦🏽👧🏽or the only ones who lost a parent or a sibling or a leg or a lover or a golden opportunity to start over?

⛱Why do we resort to impatience over patience, racism over tolerance, judging on labels of religion or nationality or gossips over soul and actions that speak for themselves?

🌹What if the big thing missing was me/you living to Give more and Do more, for others we meet- no expectation for a reward moral or material.

🗣Why are we wired to refrain or abstain from sharing, opening up, caring, loving, being kind, smiling… and all things that we know make us feel Good, and instead we run away, far, close doors, build higher walls?

🕵🏼‍♀️.. is It really Fear of getting hurt or pain or of breaking or being deceived? so, Why then would we almost always opt for “staying alive” when things go wrong or when we almost lose our chance to live as we “rush” to tick things off our bucket list feeling i needed more time to make things right.

🕺🏼Isn’t it part of being a “human” to live on all extremities and edges, to know what is pain, losing, heart breaking, starting over, being tricked or cheated, used, and hurt…

👑And, we do take alllll of these risks knowing that we shall touch the surface of what “Real love” or real caring feels like, or touch what kindness as a lifestyle looks like as someone extends it every 1 day of our existence!

🕶Don’t we take all these risks in return for the feeling of spending an extra night with someone we lost or someone ill?

🦋Arent we okay with taking these risks if it means feeling alive, getting a second chance at living life at large, like we never did until we hit that low or that loss or challenge in life ?

🐠I think i found it:

we need to be kinder and show it, accepting that if each of us was so, none will abuse as much or hate as much or feel as greedy as we all Do Today sometimes because we feel “threatened” by what the other may snatch away from us.

❤️The world was missing more “giving” and less snatching, more love and less fears of losing or dreading pain or error.

🧚🏼‍♀️Look around you, we all have family or friends who survived a traumatic incident story or relationship. Sometimes yes, things get out of hand and some people give up On life,

🥊but,

🥤Life goes on and most of us who have lost someone have also gained 10 others who were fighters and survivors against all Challenges life threw.

🤝Human nature fights for its survival. What do we little people then have to fear when nothing we are given is bigger than us to face- nothing, and that is a personal lesson i learned in all the hard yet beautiful ways.

💫☀️

#kindness #missingworld #onelife #motivation #foodforthought #pieceofmymind #love #pain

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Fragile

Fragile

⚜️My Dedications: ⚜️

To each one of you, my people, who think your sensitivity makes you vulnerable or “weak”..

To every one of you gorgeous souls who judge themselves so hard for those days when you “slip” or just slow down a bit..

⚜️We are all human and our greatest strengths are what make us stand out, different, and therefore what others try to snatch away from us because they can never be as fragile or sensitive or compassionate, loving and genuinely loved in return, let alone live the beauty of human feelings to the extreme and really know what it means to have lived through hell up until we touched self-love, forgiveness, peace and the most superior forms of healing as a result (: ⚜️

No matter where you were

What you’ve been through

Or where you are headed;

No matter the lessons you learned,

And all the remaining that’s unlearned;

No matter all the knots,

… with the untied ones in the pit of your stomach,

there to stay like there’s no need to panic.

 

Fragile.

Like a bird with a broken wing,

Sometimes we all feel that ring,

Getting tighter and tighter around the throat

Dropping down to the gut,

Where then it is there to settle..

Making its way to the bottom of the kettle,

Still trying to pour out Tea,

To make others feel free,

Because that’s what brings it energy!

Fragile, agile, senile?

You were born agile,

You feel you will never grow senile..

If love disappointed you once,

And you don’t want to take a second hit twice, yet..

Opportunity will knock back at your door,

One day, someday

Because this is life

and,

We live to interact,

to act, not act, and live a life unpacked;

to meet, to laugh, to cry, to hope, despair, to fight and surrender;

but only to rise again because our bodies demand it

… In their own little ways!

And all of this, all of it,

is the best way to learn

With whom we ought to Be Real.

We remain fragile.

 

If your career turned out disappointing,

Or what you do is really the object of your parents’ doubting;

If your friendships made you chase

..Disloyal mates who’d go behind your own back,

And in your own home talk crap

Puking in your hat,

acknowledge:

 

We remain fragile.

Our fragility was not found to be lost!

It was not there to hide..

My friend!

The life we live is like the tide,

That moves us through the ebb and flow,

Until it makes our head blow,

And our heart explode,

With the extremities of the human feeling

That can be so healing..

because

We remain fragile!

 

A complete perfect being exists not!

See that public figure, famous speaker?

The known artist, the achieved banker?

The balanced yogi, talented dancer?

Every one has lost their compass!

And has hit an impasse.

But

Choosing to find that stillness,

On a boat amid the worst of illness;

They chose to navigate,

Meditate and not perturbate

…their hearts or minds with

People’s talks or the world’s negativity.

Fragile?

In your hearts,

Find your inner room,

Make it your broom,

Shovel out of your soul

Every every foul;

Make it a practice to send away with your very owl,

A message of peace and love

… To that body engulfing you,

To that soul embracing you.

Fragile!

If Your body is a shell,

Its interior is a bell,

With tintinnabulations every time you tell,

That world and every dweller of our universe,

That you will be yourself,

Unique and alive,

Living and ready to dive

…Into whatever life carries to your plate

Because you will always be your own mate!

Fragile?

Of strength, you will never run out!

I been there and couldn’t but count

The infinite blessings our minds can use to

surmount

… every challenge, physical or mental.

You have been there too, haven’t you?

And if you think living’s a game of only two:

Life or death?

Win or lose?

Wake up! You come from an endless fountain of creation.

You are an intricate being

Blown into life.

Fragile .. yet!

With every strike,

We get to ride the bike,

In a different direction

With a different kind of affection

Towards ourselves first and foremost.

If things did not change,

In our life and other people did not turn the page

…even if on us,

We wouldn’t push for change;

We wouldn’t aim higher,

Or see that down much lower

we could find our happy;

We Wouldn’t adapt, or expand,

That intellect, that street smart, life-smart,

This skillset that saved us from the next big blow,

And instead took us to the golden bow!

Where the arrows of creativity, peace, love, and positivity

… Brighten our once grim world:)

Life is way too short,

Not to believe in you.

Yes all fragile!

Life is way too short,

Not to believe this world was created for you to shine.

Fragile?

Why though would it want you to suffer?

Life is way too short,

To sit and wonder if i will make it through.

You will.

Love ❤️,

Joy

May 7, 2018; 9.54pm

My Story

My Story

*This poem is inspired by the life and drive of colleague and a good friend of mine, Reem..*

Dont claim like you get me.

When you got the chance,

You chose not to enhance.

And whatever we had planned,

Seemed hanging on on the I-pad:

Only an unrealistic dream;

You don’t know my story.

Stop saying you cared,

By pleading and textin,

and for attention clingin;

It’s a little too late,

With my exam now closer, so full of hate.

Is it? Or really “am i” ? ..

for all the disappointments you put on my plate.

You don’t know my story.

It’s as if your hearing was impaired!

When the time was right..

And our relationship was just ripe,

In front of my parents

Stood a shadow,

Like that of a dead sparrow,

Who hasn’t yet taken any arrow

Yet acts all hollow.

You don’t know my story. 

In all our breakups,

You managed to create catch-ups,

In which You kept telling me,

Through all sorts of music mashups,

“You belong to me, and i to you

Never loving anybody like you..

And we shall never feel distant”?

But you were never persistent!

You had once said…

Forever we will be,

Yet here we are,

Two and a half hears on a crossroad

A red light paralyzing you …

A height we had foreseen,

And thought we could use to lean..

On our love? and our love!

You don’t know my story. 

 

With the weight on your parents’ hearts,

And mine behind the scenes,

Mustering a rejection…

For another religion.

While we thought we were tolerant,

Preaching against those ignorant,

What we knew of love across religions..

Yet, All we were are clay pigeons,

Molded in childhood,

And tricked into adulthood,

Thinking we were placed in control,

When all we could do was sing Snow Patrol,

Chasing cars, forgetting about reaching the stars like them rock stars,

Not realizing we lacked a good tune.

We were high on the illusion of us;

Maybe we were real and all we had still feels so real,

But when it mattered most to feel,

Where was that zeal?

You don’t know my story.

As if we weren’t all sons of a God?

And When we were abroad,

Even though it was for our parents odd

…to accept different friends across cultures,

They knew we were all flawed,

Yet they thought it just a “phase”,

That our love got us in a haze..

But here we stand today,

On the brink of a nasty break up

Or maybe a sticky makeup,

Futile-y trying to cover up,

The vast distances between two hearts.

You don’t know my story.

I built myself from scratch

And with no one there to catch

..me! even when i got to the cliff,

And i couldn’t even sniff

…hope that was less than a meter away.

You don’t know my story.

I aspire high,

And can’t lose them no matter the tie

…Yours and their scores reached,

I can’t lose a part of me they once preached.

Even if they gave up on me,

I know i must have done something right,

Courageous enough not to take flight.

You don’t know my story.

Or how she sometimes mocks me,

For being a little girl with a big dream,

And a reality that makes me beam,

Despite their illiteracy and ignorance.

We were a story of two hearts

But now of two rigid religions,

Preaching love, tolerance, and caring,

Yet Torn apart by the same God?

And without you standing ground,

I lose balance,

You completed me,

And in odd ways you still do and always will..

Oh take me out of that misery

This status quo; no!

They think they have done me no injury,

But i’m living on the periphery.

You don’t know my story.

Changing this country will be my history,

And rocking this world is my ministry.

I hope you’ll still be around to see,

Had we stood up for one another like in my dreams and secretest wishes…

Maybe then, you’d really know my story.

All my love,

Joy

May 5, 2018; 2.02 a.m.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Valentina

#OneStoryAtATime

#beirutmarathon2017 #run #lifechanger #LifeIsaMarathon , not a race 🙂

(Wondering why my last series of posts & those to come are entitled in people’s names? Feel free to visit this: https://wegrowthroughothers.wordpress.com/2017/08/31/life-is-a-marathon-not-a-race/ )
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Our Sunday 24km long-run; yes, at 18km we were supposed to be tired, but seeing the above, you start understanding the motivation we get from each other .. It’s like Magic #foreal

I Miss you my people ❤

I have a lot more people to tell you about in my marathon undertaking, especially these 2 weeks!

Mini-confession:

I had a kinda weird week to be honest, feeling a little off, a little sleepless, and a little swamped or overwhelmed with life, those have-to-dos of life that often overwhelm us till we forget to look at the bigger picture of life, the bigger purpose of why we are here – the people around us.

A piece of my mind tonight, as i cozy up in a newly-discovered little tea place, which i only discovered last week for my new thing,

Colouring 🙂 They say it’s a therapy you know? For me, doing it last Wednesday just calmed me down, it slowed down my whirlwind..of life. Loved it.

Piece of my mind tonight:

Never underestimate your existence in someone’s Life.

It takes 1 word to change someone’s day or perspective, just like it takes 1 person in one’s life to inspire, to help accomplish a work in progress, a path, a project, a dream ..

1 can be a really big number in 1 Life 😉

 

And here’s an example Why: Valentina

So i joined the marathon and the 542 Team this past July; one thing this really changed drastically in my life, is the use of social media.

I’m not a fan, or wasn’t until this happened.

With our every Sunday long-run,  distances become longer but photos taken of us onto the marathon association become more numerous, catching us at every angle and smile!

So, we been posting lots online, which actually multiplied the number of friend requests i received..honestly, because i also encourage lots of members not on our team on those long runs – genuinely because it keeps me going – i practically know everyone by now and it’s been contagious!

Okay  so, with this social media – stampede hehe well, i got a friend request from a certain Valentina..

(PS: i usually prefer to respect the privacy of my subjects hence i omit certain details in photos or typing).

For some reason, looking at the friend request aroused my curiosity, partly perhaps because the name was Italian (non-Lebanese) and partly because i felt something was behind this friend request, #cantexplain.

So , I messaged her, asking if we knew each other or if we had met..

She replied with her story that she is also registered in the Beirut Marathon, that she runs, etc..

We had found common grounds across borders, only because of this 1 undertaking i took on this past summer,

which at the time seemed more for personal reasons rather than being there for others; nonetheless, here we were.

We became facebook friends, but now…very good friends is more like it because well, the messages we are exchanging, the sharing of friends we are having as she meets my running buddies and teammates through our photos first and then through adding them on facebook and chatting with them herself ..have just been WOW  and #surreal.

Have a look at few thing she shared with me, those things that kick-started a genuine, beautiful friendship:

Valentina is Italian; she has had this dream for so long, and that is:

Visiting Lebanon, the land and country she’s madly in love with, and running the Beirut marathon.

She is no runner, or was not, until this year, as she explains, she went completely “crazy”-determined and planned on making her dream a reality.

She has had challenges, physical ones mostly, as she’s had to re-adjust her eating habits a lot, as well as her watch her nutrition and monitor the intake of carbs, proteins, etc..

Also, she was running alone.

Today, my people, truly it has been beyond beautiful to see her messages, her sharings, her postings, her messages, all of which just make HER and US here see,

You can make a difference in 1’s life, with the littlest to the largest things you help them in.

Our support was only online, minimal, you might add probably useless for a physical-effort which you’d expect to need to complete 28 and 30km.. and more in time.

Yet,

my whole team, our idea, our runs, our photos, now include her, at heart, until she’s here in October, when we already planned team hikes and outings for her to see the beauty in Lebanon and have memories.

More so, my running buddy, up in the photo, Abbas .. he will surely have a post about him for you to read through, but for now, i must tell you:

this week, he called me over the moon.

I said what’s up, he said,

i am on cloud 9; i am walking in my hometown tonight near the sea when i started thinking how You Joy, how our team, and how Valentina have dropped into my life like in a parachute, like angels who came down just for me, to make me happier and fill my life…”

I was speechless on the end of the line.

He rocked my world. I had rocked his. Together, we also each rocked Valentina’s world. Also, Valentina rocked my world. She made me believe in bonds being formed cross border as genuinely and as beautiully. We know her now more than anything, we really do because as i am discovering, in

#Running, you have only one personality, the Real You and all those who run, are happy, they are truly giving, caring, alert to other’s abilities and needs.

And that’s just been 2 months in all this undertaking.

Cannot wait for more. Yes, runs are getting tougher, but so are our bonds and mental support, truly, has proved to be 70-75% of the run v/s 25-30% for physical readiness and fitness..

 

I hope this inspires you  the way it did me.

Please be safe, you re 1 person, but a whole lot in some one else’s life, your son,  daughter’s, either parents’, your friend’s, your teammate’s…

With all my love,

Joy

Sept. 16, 2017 at 9.29pm

(going to sleep early tonight for our 5am 26km run tomorrow Sunday!!)

 

 

A Visitor, Not a Permanent Resident: Please, Light Up

“There will be times when your soul seems nothing but tired and your mind tries to pull you back into the darkness you have fought so diligently to be free of.

It is normal, and it is okay.

Being genuinely happy and at peace does not mean being in a consistent state of elation.

Don’t beat yourself up because you don’t wake up with a radiating smile every single day.

Understand that being vulnerable to negative emotions is a part of being human, and it in no way makes you weak or pathetic .

Continue to be patient and kind with yourself ,

Continue to fight through those draining moments and do not allow them to persist longer than they should.

You are in complete control;

sadness is simply a visitor within your mental space, not a permanent resident.

Chat with it, understand it, master it, and most importantly, know when to say goodbye.

You will make up the next morning and everything will make sense. It will all be wonderful. Believe that!”

I read this a while back my beautiful people. I honestly can’t remember when , where, who, or how, but it came up back today and i felt a lot of us out there need it. Truly🌈.

I have a new undertaking i’m dying to tell you about, my people.

It is literally changing my life, my every single day.

And so, telling you about it, i am sure you can relate it to your lives. Here’s a sneak peak (foto), stay tuned for more i promise in a new post for just “us time”.

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All my love,

PS: Be happy, but let yourself be sad too ..because sadness, well, it brings people TogetheR in its own way, by revealing vulnerabilty, humility (tears), emotion, affection, care, love …

Joy ♥️

Someone Like You in this World..Exists

Genuine Exchanges We All Need: There is still someone like you in this world, yup;)

Hello there:)

Miss you my people, sorry i have been less in touch than i’d love to, just taking care of some professional mishaps, but all will be well, it always has to end well, or it’s not the end, right?;)

I hope this post adds some food for thought into your Sunday chill zone:)

PS: I f you can read on, i have a music recommendation/a loveliest band i watched perform: Epic!

Sometimes, i think to myself, this society i am now part of, is not the same as it used to be. It often feels like I’m the only genuine person, looking for genuine fun, for genuine feelings, for a simple good time, a mutual sharing, caring, and exchange..A simple life and good moments to share with others with no nasty motives, when i am not working to make a living and provide ourselves and families.

I keep putting myself out there in the world, i do, really.

Most of us are putting in the effort to socialize; However, it seems like everyone is after something: your money, your power, your position, your connections..you name it, we all fell on (a) “wrong” person(s) in our life, haven’t we?

We don’t feel as comfortable anymore putting ourselves out there. You bet we won’t.

But ..my reality tonight shows: majority of others in this life, think the same as you do. You just need to ask the question and you will get an answer:)

Tonight.. I met a very dear person, a dear friend called M.B.who has settled in the UAE for 4 years or even more now, as far as i can recall us corresponding; he is visiting Lebanon for a week-lucky us!

We met tonight to watch an amazing band called Arnabeat perform at a beautiful pub, with 2 of his people: H. and M-A. That beautiful group of people showed me that even complete strangers can be/think/feel exactly like you do, wanting the same things you want in life: good people, good food, good stories, and so, a good time- all we need is be open, genuine, and exchange a bit of yourself – others will follow suit and tara!

The truth is, I have been in Lebanon for almost 1.5 years since i came back from the UK. Since, it has honestly been challenging to understand how people/the society has changed. The customs, values perhaps are still the same, but people have made it a bit tougher to deal with each other, in the sense, to be transparent and honest about their intentions towards you or your friendship..

In any society or nation of this world, when things get tough, i.e. the national economy and growth stifle, or when politicians’ intentions are no longer centered on the people, new laws are ambiguous, or when making a decent living becomes a heavier burden..people feel it first.

Out of survival instinct, aka Dr. Steve Peter’s Chimp Paradox, it seems we shut down the generous side of us, the genuine giving character and social character because we feel everyone/everything around us is taking a piece of us, or is a potential threat to our wealth, health, and welfare. It makes sense right?

However, tonight, meeting this adorable group of new people has shown me that despite life’s uneasiness, every one of us still values and indulges in intimate, genuine bonds of social interaction and friendship.

Simply put then, We all love good company and a good vibe on a weekend night out, don’t we?

So, you are not alone in your thinking; you are not alone in feeling the fear to put yourself out there; you are not alone in appreciating a good friend, a genuine exchange and getting to know new people.

Others appreciate them, but our world has just made it more difficult for people like you, me, and those with you on this journey, to be as genuine. So stick to what you value, and you will see how other will fall into your circle, appreciating, loving your attitude and thus revealing their exact same attitude to you because deep down, we long to be heard and appreciated by others, we really do.

We are all connected.

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We are all still looking for this now-rare “race” of people, this extinct species capable of carrying this positive vibe to the dinner table, this easiness to initiate conversations, exchange hilarious life incidents, or just this dancing-the-night away attitude, for the sake of a good time and a good, well-deserved laugh after a week(s) of hard work.

When we left tonight, this new group of people I spent the eve with were no longer strangers, but they also shared how “rare people like you are in this world these days [Joy].”

This was meant as a compliment and it touched me deeply; however, it is also at the same time not entirely true because my evening with them revealed there are still other people like Me in this world 🙂 We value the same interactions and simplicity in chats and fun!

I mean, who does not like to be at a dinner table and listen to jokes or funny stories and exchange his/hers? Who prefers to listen to nagging and whining and heart-breaking stories or to look at artificial people showing off all night?

Who does not like to make new friends? to share what they do and know with someone interested to listen?

Who does not like to feel a sense of security and trust amplified? Who does not enjoy exploring other people’s stories (hardship lessons or achievements’), hobbies, passions, and find someone whose hobby complements his or hers and can take it to further heights?

There is someone, many actually, like you in this world; they share these heart-felt needs to bond with people over simple fun, simple exchanges, simple goodness.

We just need to find each other, and the only way to do that, is you to open up, show a piece of your genuine self, not being scared, and see how magically others open up.

You are not the only human who appreciates this, or that, many others are like you, but the adversity in this world and the challenges to build a life amid current national and international developments is pushing you to lose  yourself, your giving,transparent self, and to bury yourself in your own cocoon, where you think nothing bad can happen there, when in reality, you yourself would be degrading, losing yourself, your goodness, kindness, your communication skills that make you a human being, a compassionate creature by nature.

Very truly yours,

Joy

March 12, 2017

She Got Engaged; I Learned to Be Her Second Line of Defense

My childhood best friend, E.G., got engaged 8 months ago today.

My post comes 8 months overdue, but it comes on an evening I found all my thoughts drifting towards her, her photos on social media with her partner, contemplating the life she’s built for herself.

My sister, Sadness, and I were dining together earlier this evening, when she told me,

Joy, you you, you have a way with words..no matter what you tell me, it does not surprise me because I know your words got you this, that, and there, they can get you anywhere.

So here I am using the thing i am apparently best at, to express my love, my heartfelt pride, and my happiness, to someone… SO DEAR, to my heart.

E.G is the most delicate human being you’ll ever meet, like a beautiful butterfly- literally.

She’s the most kind heart-ed being. She carries the innocence of a child; do not get me wrong though, life has taught her lots of things.

Her choice to get engaged comes from a fully grown lady, a lady I admire and cherish with all of my heart. I may have failed to show her this through actions, physical gestures, and social media “likes” and “hearts”.

But … deep down is where it all matters, isn’t it? All the feelings, all the thought, all what you wish someone?

I admire her, partly because she has the courage to love; a courage I sometimes doubt I have or know how to use. Do you?

I may have the courage to fight for my career, for my professional and personal growth and development, my survival from a dramatic accident and chronic injuries, but she…

She fought and lost many battles at love,

but she also won – a lot more than she ever lost, in my eyes at least.

Love breaks, in ways we each grew familiar with in our own ways, don’t you think?

Her story is a fairy tale, but there’s a catch:

to date, I do not know exactly how to feel having someone as dear be engaged. Some of you may think, it’s the cycle of life, nothing changes, it’s the normal thing that should have happened…

But, for those of you who like me, may think a bit further of this big step for someone like E.G.,who has had her share of right and wrong relationships, then I feel differently, and at one point I felt like I “had fallen out of her life”.

For instance, I keep feeling I should have done something: I should have been there, at the proposal, after the proposal; I should have brought that gift, or sent that card I never sent but i blame life for diverting our paths or putting in new people I barely know.. or maybe I even blame myself for having decided to travel for two years to pursue a masters, knowing she had something potentially serious going on, yet i couldn’t keep in touch in the same way we were..

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Life did put us on different paths, and sometimes, I think maybe I should have taken that extra mile every time i had the chance or time to stay in her life the same way we use to be, maybe then she wouldn’t feel disappointed of me or our friendship, or wonder where did we stop being that close in daily life.

But tonight, I see that those phone chats we share now and then, those occasional Sunday brunches, and those flawless memories we share from our childhood and in our innocent hearts still have us registered as the friends we use to be, exactly, and it’s all just more in my head.

As the day passed by today, I had a different take on life;

A little context for how i was inspired to post tonight:

I have been on a short unexpected period “off” work and this past week, I’ve been enjoying the little things, like

My mum, being with her to pray, to shop, to prepare lunch at home.. like

My Dad, his cuddling knowing that he is a stiff, solid Man;

my sister coming back from work, with the same drained and beaten look on her face only i am there to console her, listen to her, feed her, or just listen to her learning about low people, unprofessional and undeserving managers..

my workout, runs, and training at the gym and outdoors as they reminded me of how good i feel about myself once i accomplish those little training milestones.

Tonight, I finally realize I did not “fall out of E.G.’s life”, but out into her second line of defense

All relationships evolve, romances above all.

From a young married couple in their 20s and 30s, to their 80s or 70s, love alone or the flame does not survive, it’s rather the entire package, the respect, the admiration, the caring, the taking care of each other, the dreams and plans you see with your significant other, the interests you share or different tastes you experience because of each other..

[PS: For those of you with a richer experience on love than mine, please feel free to share your lesson in the comments sections: I for one would learn so much from you, really.]

So, if that is true and the package is the key, then i know with her getting engaged, life shifted my positions, in her life.

I need to allow life to make these changes, else i’d ruin its plans for my loved ones; i see now how i fell right into E.G.’s second line of defense.

I am no longer in the front row, enjoying a close up view, but rather sat on that balcony, where she owns the stage, she is its star, and she knows I am there and will be, whenever she signals it:)

Try not to jump into conclusions or allow your doubts or fear of losing a close one push you to move out of their life because they sure want you in it. At least, this is my lesson from E.G.

Being in second line of defense is in fact, key and crucial. If you are not there, who would protect her heart, which is initially inside, closer to your line than the first, cause who builds a fortress and sits outside of it? You’re that second line, that inner circle, not that outer layer. Enjoy it, see it, feel it, and act like it.

Keep your warm memories of you two, cherish the other’s adventures and love stories, be there for them as much as you can. As you do your best to do all these,  your dear one sees it or must see it one day – at least what i believe today, in this situation, with these thoughts, at my age of 27.

I know I count and I know how happy it makes me to see her so grown up; exactly my age she is.. but way ahead of me in the courage she has to love.

E.G., may the odds be forever in your favour. I love you.

Truly yours,

Joy

Feb.23, 2017 at 2.38am