Someone Like You in this World..Exists

Genuine Exchanges We All Need: There is still someone like you in this world, yup;)

Hello there:)

Miss you my people, sorry i have been less in touch than i’d love to, just taking care of some professional mishaps, but all will be well, it always has to end well, or it’s not the end, right?;)

I hope this post adds some food for thought into your Sunday chill zone:)

PS: I f you can read on, i have a music recommendation/a loveliest band i watched perform: Epic!

Sometimes, i think to myself, this society i am now part of, is not the same as it used to be. It often feels like I’m the only genuine person, looking for genuine fun, for genuine feelings, for a simple good time, a mutual sharing, caring, and exchange..A simple life and good moments to share with others with no nasty motives, when i am not working to make a living and provide ourselves and families.

I keep putting myself out there in the world, i do, really.

Most of us are putting in the effort to socialize; However, it seems like everyone is after something: your money, your power, your position, your connections..you name it, we all fell on (a) “wrong” person(s) in our life, haven’t we?

We don’t feel as comfortable anymore putting ourselves out there. You bet we won’t.

But ..my reality tonight shows: majority of others in this life, think the same as you do. You just need to ask the question and you will get an answer:)

Tonight.. I met a very dear person, a dear friend called M.B.who has settled in the UAE for 4 years or even more now, as far as i can recall us corresponding; he is visiting Lebanon for a week-lucky us!

We met tonight to watch an amazing band called Arnabeat perform at a beautiful pub, with 2 of his people: H. and M-A. That beautiful group of people showed me that even complete strangers can be/think/feel exactly like you do, wanting the same things you want in life: good people, good food, good stories, and so, a good time- all we need is be open, genuine, and exchange a bit of yourself – others will follow suit and tara!

The truth is, I have been in Lebanon for almost 1.5 years since i came back from the UK. Since, it has honestly been challenging to understand how people/the society has changed. The customs, values perhaps are still the same, but people have made it a bit tougher to deal with each other, in the sense, to be transparent and honest about their intentions towards you or your friendship..

In any society or nation of this world, when things get tough, i.e. the national economy and growth stifle, or when politicians’ intentions are no longer centered on the people, new laws are ambiguous, or when making a decent living becomes a heavier burden..people feel it first.

Out of survival instinct, aka Dr. Steve Peter’s Chimp Paradox, it seems we shut down the generous side of us, the genuine giving character and social character because we feel everyone/everything around us is taking a piece of us, or is a potential threat to our wealth, health, and welfare. It makes sense right?

However, tonight, meeting this adorable group of new people has shown me that despite life’s uneasiness, every one of us still values and indulges in intimate, genuine bonds of social interaction and friendship.

Simply put then, We all love good company and a good vibe on a weekend night out, don’t we?

So, you are not alone in your thinking; you are not alone in feeling the fear to put yourself out there; you are not alone in appreciating a good friend, a genuine exchange and getting to know new people.

Others appreciate them, but our world has just made it more difficult for people like you, me, and those with you on this journey, to be as genuine. So stick to what you value, and you will see how other will fall into your circle, appreciating, loving your attitude and thus revealing their exact same attitude to you because deep down, we long to be heard and appreciated by others, we really do.

We are all connected.

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We are all still looking for this now-rare “race” of people, this extinct species capable of carrying this positive vibe to the dinner table, this easiness to initiate conversations, exchange hilarious life incidents, or just this dancing-the-night away attitude, for the sake of a good time and a good, well-deserved laugh after a week(s) of hard work.

When we left tonight, this new group of people I spent the eve with were no longer strangers, but they also shared how “rare people like you are in this world these days [Joy].”

This was meant as a compliment and it touched me deeply; however, it is also at the same time not entirely true because my evening with them revealed there are still other people like Me in this world 🙂 We value the same interactions and simplicity in chats and fun!

I mean, who does not like to be at a dinner table and listen to jokes or funny stories and exchange his/hers? Who prefers to listen to nagging and whining and heart-breaking stories or to look at artificial people showing off all night?

Who does not like to make new friends? to share what they do and know with someone interested to listen?

Who does not like to feel a sense of security and trust amplified? Who does not enjoy exploring other people’s stories (hardship lessons or achievements’), hobbies, passions, and find someone whose hobby complements his or hers and can take it to further heights?

There is someone, many actually, like you in this world; they share these heart-felt needs to bond with people over simple fun, simple exchanges, simple goodness.

We just need to find each other, and the only way to do that, is you to open up, show a piece of your genuine self, not being scared, and see how magically others open up.

You are not the only human who appreciates this, or that, many others are like you, but the adversity in this world and the challenges to build a life amid current national and international developments is pushing you to lose  yourself, your giving,transparent self, and to bury yourself in your own cocoon, where you think nothing bad can happen there, when in reality, you yourself would be degrading, losing yourself, your goodness, kindness, your communication skills that make you a human being, a compassionate creature by nature.

Very truly yours,

Joy

March 12, 2017

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She Got Engaged; I Learned to Be Her Second Line of Defense

My childhood best friend, E.G., got engaged 8 months ago today.

My post comes 8 months overdue, but it comes on an evening I found all my thoughts drifting towards her, her photos on social media with her partner, contemplating the life she’s built for herself.

My sister, Sadness, and I were dining together earlier this evening, when she told me,

Joy, you you, you have a way with words..no matter what you tell me, it does not surprise me because I know your words got you this, that, and there, they can get you anywhere.

So here I am using the thing i am apparently best at, to express my love, my heartfelt pride, and my happiness, to someone… SO DEAR, to my heart.

E.G is the most delicate human being you’ll ever meet, like a beautiful butterfly- literally.

She’s the most kind heart-ed being. She carries the innocence of a child; do not get me wrong though, life has taught her lots of things.

Her choice to get engaged comes from a fully grown lady, a lady I admire and cherish with all of my heart. I may have failed to show her this through actions, physical gestures, and social media “likes” and “hearts”.

But … deep down is where it all matters, isn’t it? All the feelings, all the thought, all what you wish someone?

I admire her, partly because she has the courage to love; a courage I sometimes doubt I have or know how to use. Do you?

I may have the courage to fight for my career, for my professional and personal growth and development, my survival from a dramatic accident and chronic injuries, but she…

She fought and lost many battles at love,

but she also won – a lot more than she ever lost, in my eyes at least.

Love breaks, in ways we each grew familiar with in our own ways, don’t you think?

Her story is a fairy tale, but there’s a catch:

to date, I do not know exactly how to feel having someone as dear be engaged. Some of you may think, it’s the cycle of life, nothing changes, it’s the normal thing that should have happened…

But, for those of you who like me, may think a bit further of this big step for someone like E.G.,who has had her share of right and wrong relationships, then I feel differently, and at one point I felt like I “had fallen out of her life”.

For instance, I keep feeling I should have done something: I should have been there, at the proposal, after the proposal; I should have brought that gift, or sent that card I never sent but i blame life for diverting our paths or putting in new people I barely know.. or maybe I even blame myself for having decided to travel for two years to pursue a masters, knowing she had something potentially serious going on, yet i couldn’t keep in touch in the same way we were..

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Life did put us on different paths, and sometimes, I think maybe I should have taken that extra mile every time i had the chance or time to stay in her life the same way we use to be, maybe then she wouldn’t feel disappointed of me or our friendship, or wonder where did we stop being that close in daily life.

But tonight, I see that those phone chats we share now and then, those occasional Sunday brunches, and those flawless memories we share from our childhood and in our innocent hearts still have us registered as the friends we use to be, exactly, and it’s all just more in my head.

As the day passed by today, I had a different take on life;

A little context for how i was inspired to post tonight:

I have been on a short unexpected period “off” work and this past week, I’ve been enjoying the little things, like

My mum, being with her to pray, to shop, to prepare lunch at home.. like

My Dad, his cuddling knowing that he is a stiff, solid Man;

my sister coming back from work, with the same drained and beaten look on her face only i am there to console her, listen to her, feed her, or just listen to her learning about low people, unprofessional and undeserving managers..

my workout, runs, and training at the gym and outdoors as they reminded me of how good i feel about myself once i accomplish those little training milestones.

Tonight, I finally realize I did not “fall out of E.G.’s life”, but out into her second line of defense

All relationships evolve, romances above all.

From a young married couple in their 20s and 30s, to their 80s or 70s, love alone or the flame does not survive, it’s rather the entire package, the respect, the admiration, the caring, the taking care of each other, the dreams and plans you see with your significant other, the interests you share or different tastes you experience because of each other..

[PS: For those of you with a richer experience on love than mine, please feel free to share your lesson in the comments sections: I for one would learn so much from you, really.]

So, if that is true and the package is the key, then i know with her getting engaged, life shifted my positions, in her life.

I need to allow life to make these changes, else i’d ruin its plans for my loved ones; i see now how i fell right into E.G.’s second line of defense.

I am no longer in the front row, enjoying a close up view, but rather sat on that balcony, where she owns the stage, she is its star, and she knows I am there and will be, whenever she signals it:)

Try not to jump into conclusions or allow your doubts or fear of losing a close one push you to move out of their life because they sure want you in it. At least, this is my lesson from E.G.

Being in second line of defense is in fact, key and crucial. If you are not there, who would protect her heart, which is initially inside, closer to your line than the first, cause who builds a fortress and sits outside of it? You’re that second line, that inner circle, not that outer layer. Enjoy it, see it, feel it, and act like it.

Keep your warm memories of you two, cherish the other’s adventures and love stories, be there for them as much as you can. As you do your best to do all these,  your dear one sees it or must see it one day – at least what i believe today, in this situation, with these thoughts, at my age of 27.

I know I count and I know how happy it makes me to see her so grown up; exactly my age she is.. but way ahead of me in the courage she has to love.

E.G., may the odds be forever in your favour. I love you.

Truly yours,

Joy

Feb.23, 2017 at 2.38am

How to know you’re Blessed

Hello there! Couldn’t stay away for too long this time:$

Oh well, truth be told, it’s getting late on my side of the world [as in 1.30 am late), yet i am sleepless for some reason..

Playing a playlist of Zen music in attempts to fall asleep but…too high on life, hehe 🙂 Those who know me know me i.e. in real life would definitely say YES to that (A);

I reckon even My People  would agree too, those who are on my Good Day mailing list

(this last by the way started as a humble chain of kindness, few names on there, yet apparently now turning into a beautiful ‘secret society’ as some of the most genuine friends among My People referred to it it this week:)

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So here i am sat with Fluffy, resorting to you on our beautifully-shared platform, to share a piece of where my mind wanders.

Lesson of the week:

Blessings come in words, actions, thoughts, and/or signs (silent or loud- all the same), we just got to keep an eye for them! Life is beautiful, absolutely beautiful to have a heart beat:))

You know you are blessed, when even before the week is over, even before it has been 7 days since u invested in 1 act of kindness and mindfulness, you are overwhelmed with messages of kindness, appreciation, self-fulfillment… and life opens up, it just lights up

i.e. when you feel so loved simply because you “touched” another life , another.

..even from those people you thought of as: grumpy, irritated, uptight…let alone those already sweet and explicit and straight forward in expressing their emotions in life.

  1. I sent out my usual Good Day Email this morning; that was it today:
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Woke up feeling particularly grateful today, really beautiful feeling:) couldn’t keep it to myself so sharing it with you My People. Let’s have Faith in life and its ways – no matter what i going on right now in ur day, week, or life. There’s always someone watching out for you, in action, prayer, or thought-always..and these do count: I ave reaped their effects and it’s surreal but actually real. 

The ripple effect on my people toady in particular, felt special, amazing, in the lines of a powerful, loaded blessing like this:

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We all know how challenging it can get to ditch the bad mood you woke up in, don’t we?

And the below too, partly in Arabic  – the official language here in Lebanon:

(last Arabic word = “today”)

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2. In my post yesterday (here), i did tell you how i “invested” in my people..in the smallest of ways this week and the past one;

So have a look at how my week went by, and tell me if they make any one, even the grumpiest person ever, feel good about themselves and propped up, for real, or not:

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(Arabic translation: Thank you from the bottom of my heart; I am completely speechless, Thank you so very much.)

3. I had not added anyone to my Good Day mailing list for months..  Knowing i have a vow since April 2015 to add 1 person every day, yup, i was frustrated deep down as to why i have no one new on there for a while now. I did not force it though.’coincidentally’- NOT, only a week ago, look what happened:

In the first 3 days of the week only, I had already added: S.G., J.S., J.A, M.A, S.B…& counting and their reactions …. !!!

PS:

Someone very special is finally visiting Lebanon again tomorrow ad i cannot wait to see them! I think that counts as legit driver of insomnia, right?:$;)

My people, my beautiful circle, my strength, and the only ones who keep me going here on this blog and in life:

Time flies,

days pass by,

we may not pass from here again,

let’s spread love, kindness, and

share all we would love to say to someone while we are still at it, this life, this health we now have – even if we think it’s not really a good “health” or “life”..

 

With all my love,

Joy

May 13, 2016 at 1.48am

Loved this: your dose of love

By Sean Stephenson: (just ‘met’ him today)

No words..I’d be selfish not to share how this made me feel tonight.

Tough life – yes MANY times; Losing Purpose and Drive- YES heck YES;

Loving yourself attracts you to you-ALWAYS,

and You to your once in a lifetime kind of people –

a system of support that makes every minute of life- worth.

 

With all my love,

Joy

Apr.26, 2016; 11.39pm

A Secret Ingredient

🙂

Sharing an interesting, recent life mix of: Loneliness, Hope, Reflections, and Love.

Happy Easter my beautiful people;

celebrating or not this holiday, I hope we all had a ‘fair’ amount of time: to mend, to take care of ourselves, and to enjoy the things and people we cherish most in our busy, sometimes overwhelming lives.

I am compelled to share one gem to take away tonight:

 

A Movie Recommendation: Unconditional (link below)

Came across this movie by chance tonight. No words can possibly express how it spoke to me, truly. Powerful, beautiful, realbased on a true story of someone who chose, like us on this platform, to share their story, perhaps it may help others:)

 

My Lessons of the Day (if you have the time, please do read-on):

I had met my beautiful friend since high school, E.G. earlier this afternoon. Honestly, I had been procrastinating our catch-up for weeks on end to be very honest, justified horribly by: “i’m too busy/overworked, stressed “etc. you get the idea.

Our exchange … left us both ‘cured’. For real.

Lesson #1:

All it took was the will, the nudge forward to actually meet up, selflessly investing an hour of our time in one another.

Highlight of our catch-up: we brainstormed on new, practical plans to launch in this upcoming month, for a more interesting, enriching life outside of work/other commitments life imposes on us more often than not:

I, Joy, have the expansion of my Blogging learning curve & the self-enjoyment/fulfillment that comes wrapped within those, in the lines of new acts of kindness I can/shall coin for My People (Stay tuned for those!);

while E.G. has a good amount of amusing investigation to discover something she loves to do, for herself, not for anything or anyone else and start it. It’s time for new options on the table of life!

Not by coincidence, this past week was also blessed with the visit of a precious friend E.H.; I did not get the chance to tell him though things I’d also love you, my people, to hear:

Lesson #2:

I urge you to always knock the doors, even when you’re not sure who or what will be on the other end;

1.I began to fall in love with the Bloggers’ community I am exploring online day in, day in!

I would just love it if everyone now ‘meets’ my new friends here on the blogging platforms: Steph and Tea especially :D:D

Beautiful, beautiful people, stories, and moral support.

2.Opening up this Blog and posting on it merely to share my story with “others” who share my cup of tea in life, is the best thing I EVER did in my life so far.

Every new notification on here gives me the chills and every new blogger i discover close to my outlook to life and character gives me reason to celebrate, be thankful, and smile every single day.

3. The “we only truly grow through others” Life Lesson & Self-help tip ‘driving’ this Blog wins yet again:

I wanted to give my students (first through third year undergraduates) a special, professional guest-speaker for their Marketing Modules, so i spread the word genuinely across my humble network of people- no one renowned or hotshot trust me.

Within 6 days, exactly, I was referred to, met, and chatted with my confirmed Speaker – a hotshot, regional Marketing  Professional in one of the biggest Holdings in the Middle East, R.B.

Hearing my genuine mission with students in my first year as an academic, and sensing my excited intentions to share with our students something ‘practical, memorable and engaging’, he is now willing to share his story, expertise, and knowledge for no return – at a date we assign with our university. I cannot wait to see how we’ll get on with this!

Talk about investing through “others”? What do you think? How else could I have currently grown in my mission as instructor and academic officer of my students at the British School of Business, if not by asking “others”, valuing or  recognizing “others”, genuinely appreciating them, being interested in what drives them, and hearing or learning from “others”in the networks of my people?

🙂 I rest my case for tonight on this one.

Lesson #3:

In the loneliest times of all, you’re never really alone. Love is the most powerful thing on Earth and I’ve seen what it can do.”

I learned not to ever again underestimate the Love of our “special people” and how much it allows them to understand us.

I learned not to ever again underestimate how much putting the ‘small’ yet crucially-needed effort to see a good friend (you don’t see every day because of ‘life’) over for a Coffee/Tea can do you good and release you from weeks of ‘not-such-a great’ relationship with life.

I learned to always live simply- literally; that is, communicate all grey thoughts or areas you may have because only by honest expression and naked truths, do two people really strengthen and build-on their relationship.

I am sure it was no coincidence at all that, as I felt I could not understand life perfectly these past two weeks, the right people next to me, E.G and E.H. were here for me, when I thought I was the one who should be/is here for them.. but then I realized,

Lesson#4: The Secret Ingredient

Soulmates… 🙂 the blessing I recently understood right.

A true Soulmate is not a perfect fit it seems! It’s more of, a mirror, the person who show you everything that is holding you back,

the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

[…Soulmates] tear down your walls and smack you awake […].

They come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.

[They] shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions,

break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life[…]“.

 

Always eager to know your thoughts..:)

With all my love,

Joy

March 29, 2016.