Nobody Trusts? Reversed Living Metrics

I miss you my people. I mean it.

My day’s lesson:

The worst case scenario is that no one trusts […] everybody is suspicious“,  [if/when you are kind and selfless]

#reversed #metrics
Today, it’s called #human #development ? Loved the vid, had to share.

 

#kindness helps you live multiple lives, instead of one, which is basically only yours.

With kindness, you get a piece of everyone’s lives.

Don’t you be scared to be “human”, the world is upside down, not you for being the way you are, being a “human” i.e. a compassionate.

 

I miss you my people. And I mean it because ..

I have been tied up with work commitments, leaving me to arrive home late, like you probably, with eyes too tired to open, let alone to look at a screen even if it’s for the one thing i love MOST: talking to you here, instead of to myself or overthinking on my own.

I hope you feel the same, cause this is our no judgment space, as always.

I think of you here,  often, and of my not being here every day, especially  to legit-ly meet you my new, recent followers and those who have met me through my beautiful new blogging friend Alara Karis:) and catch up with you my beautiful, most unique friends I’ve had in this life, really.

Never thought blogging would help me meet people and get to know them the way i do today and the way we make each other feel through our likes and/or comments.

This platform is by far the most generous: never failing to provide me (and you i hope) support, discretely or explicitly or both at once. It never failed to make me feel safe in my sharing, in listening, reading my thoughts,, giving,  generously time among other things, and never failed in helping me find at least one blogger, “like-r” or comment-or who understood exactly where i was coming from..

All my love,

Joy

June 14, 2017; 10.13pm

Today, You Have: Today

Hello my people:):)

it’s 6.39am here and If i am delayed for 3 extra minutes, i may end up late to work; nonetheless, i have so much to tell you, but for time-constraint, i’m just going to share 1 of a gazillion beautiful things i have to tell this week.

Hope it makes your day, every day, really, cause each one of you deserves the best, and to be at their best, for you first and for all those around you.

#truth

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May your every today be your favourite day 🙂
Be ALL THERE,
those in your daily lives need you to just be all there, today,
Even if you not being here all day secures better plans for your future with those others.
That future, you can change, but that today, has already passed 😉
All my love,
Joy
June 7, 2017

Ever Lost a Best Friend?

Mariah.

She was a Mariah; a childhood friend. I lost her in grade 6 or 7. We were friends since kindergarten. Today, without knowing, we share a network of people we each met separately through university and workplaces basically. What a small world huh?!

[What about you? Please feel free to type in a relevant name…:) ]

I never thought i would actually talk about this one day … but here i am letting it out cause it has been on my mind, and because I am always truthful in my thoughts to you my people for one simple reason:

I know that deep down, each of us has been there, done that, or dealt with a “moving on” from one phase to another in this life, whether it was a phase or a person.

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This has happened such a long time ago when i was like 13 or 14 years old i think, maybe a little younger: I lost my then-called “best friend”, “truly best” friend.

It’s not like i’m traumatized by that, at least not that i’m aware of its effect on me lol, but in the past 2 weeks, she has been popping right in front of me in different places, which got me thinking, and checking out what she’s been up to through social media channels.

We are not friends on fb or on social media, as i recall fb was non-existent when we use to sleep over each other’s etc.

And as it turns out, friends on my platforms have friends who are common friends with her, so it wasn’t such a hard job to find out where she’s been and what she’s been up to.

We go back to kindergarten. We use to hang out with each other all the time. Our parents became friends because we were inseparable . She was really where I would spend most of my time.

She was there when that girl in class was so jealous of me and we use to plot against her haha. She was there when I had my first sense of fashion, and she even got influenced by mine. We also did have that jealousy phase between each other. I use to come tell mom about it and the latter would just sit with me, explain how at our age, we are building our personalities and we do these things, we get jealous, we get irritated at times, but after all, she use to say, you are good friends, that’s what matters most, right?

And i’d just pack up my honest, simple heart, and meet her the next day, hang out as we claimed to our parents we were “studying together”:D

*i smile at the thought of how we’d just hang out and watch teli, or gossip a bit about stuff or what party we’ll be invited to.*

Then, one day out of the blue, been years together, she’s diagnosed with Diabetes. At the time, yes it was treatable and all, but, it was still something that altered your lifestyle, something that would make you think twice about going outdoors to bike or whatever because an injury for a diabetic person is tricky, or dangerous. Not as casual as it is today with all those high-tech, easy to carry, use and measure equipment. Times were different then really on that aspect, even though i am only 27 today, things jump started quite a bit since my teen years.

Back then, it also meant needles, and her responsibility to keep balancing that insulin level, detect hypo-or hyper-glycemia and keep a candy at hand just in cases..I know, no matter what she thought, it was hard on her. I don’t recall us talking about it, or how she dealt with it… for all i know she may have just surpassed it better than i’ll ever know. But, what i seem to remember – which honestly i have no idea why i remember all these details now that i decided to blog about it “shortly”- is that around that same time diabetes came up in her life, we had become a more “open” circle, where more, different friends came into our friendship.. Things were already changing on the friends front at the same time as her diabetes then.

I was feeling uneasy, hurt and cut deep, as now my one on one time, my “own best” friend as we saw it at that age, was preferring to spend more and more time with these new friends. Besides the fact that i was and still am a generous person who invests i others, especially friends, she was everything to me…

but apparently, not so much in hers? She was choosing to spend time with those friends who in my head, did not know her as much as i did. I liked them, but to be completely honest, i kind of knew that we were different, like, i knew, at 13-14 years of age, they were not my tribe, not those i’d entirely click with.

They chased things that did not really tempt me, read or followed news i was not entirely into or even slightly now as i try to recall, but it was fine with me, i could be a good sport and learn a bit more about what interested them.

But god knows how much i tried to play along. I wasn’t annoyed by them, but i just felt they were different. In their hearts, we carried still the same innocence and good up bringing, but in their heads, in our heads:

me and them- things were different, priorities differed, shallowness differed, what we wanted in life differed even at that age… and so, Mariah and I .. we began to drift apart.

It was a slow process, she became more friends with them slowly, then her mom also became friends with their parents who also led quite a different lifestyle than ours at home..

Now, what I draw from that context today is:

Holding a grudge really does nothing but shrink your world in this life you lead.

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A few months back, I bumped into her at a beauty salon. I was in a different room, but the corner of my eye caught her. I realised then, i am not someone who carries grudges or who ever aims to carry one against whoever it was.

Since then, look at me, having you people here, my people on my good day email chain, my huge circles here in lebanon to the uk, to canada, south africa, the netherlands.. to around the world where my friend now are.

Life ladies and gents.. leaves no man behind,  NO MAN BEHIND:)

Also, Not all people are meant to stay in your life: today i look at her, her circle of friends, her life, and I just don’t feel i belong there:)

It takes time to accept, but it will come, have some faith!

Like, i bet every one of you has a certain person or group of persons who they think they like, or they think ouh wonder what it would feel like to be part of their group, but then, you realise you wouldn’t be wearing shoes you are comfortable in every single day, or every single night you hang out with them.

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PS:

I’d love to dedicate this blog post to E., whom i had promised to email yet still did not..and for other reasons she told me about;) Hope this post gives you a breath of fresh air by the time i reply to your email legitimately;)

With all my love,

Joy

Apr.27, 2017 at 12.39am

Someone Like You in this World..Exists

Genuine Exchanges We All Need: There is still someone like you in this world, yup;)

Hello there:)

Miss you my people, sorry i have been less in touch than i’d love to, just taking care of some professional mishaps, but all will be well, it always has to end well, or it’s not the end, right?;)

I hope this post adds some food for thought into your Sunday chill zone:)

PS: I f you can read on, i have a music recommendation/a loveliest band i watched perform: Epic!

Sometimes, i think to myself, this society i am now part of, is not the same as it used to be. It often feels like I’m the only genuine person, looking for genuine fun, for genuine feelings, for a simple good time, a mutual sharing, caring, and exchange..A simple life and good moments to share with others with no nasty motives, when i am not working to make a living and provide ourselves and families.

I keep putting myself out there in the world, i do, really.

Most of us are putting in the effort to socialize; However, it seems like everyone is after something: your money, your power, your position, your connections..you name it, we all fell on (a) “wrong” person(s) in our life, haven’t we?

We don’t feel as comfortable anymore putting ourselves out there. You bet we won’t.

But ..my reality tonight shows: majority of others in this life, think the same as you do. You just need to ask the question and you will get an answer:)

Tonight.. I met a very dear person, a dear friend called M.B.who has settled in the UAE for 4 years or even more now, as far as i can recall us corresponding; he is visiting Lebanon for a week-lucky us!

We met tonight to watch an amazing band called Arnabeat perform at a beautiful pub, with 2 of his people: H. and M-A. That beautiful group of people showed me that even complete strangers can be/think/feel exactly like you do, wanting the same things you want in life: good people, good food, good stories, and so, a good time- all we need is be open, genuine, and exchange a bit of yourself – others will follow suit and tara!

The truth is, I have been in Lebanon for almost 1.5 years since i came back from the UK. Since, it has honestly been challenging to understand how people/the society has changed. The customs, values perhaps are still the same, but people have made it a bit tougher to deal with each other, in the sense, to be transparent and honest about their intentions towards you or your friendship..

In any society or nation of this world, when things get tough, i.e. the national economy and growth stifle, or when politicians’ intentions are no longer centered on the people, new laws are ambiguous, or when making a decent living becomes a heavier burden..people feel it first.

Out of survival instinct, aka Dr. Steve Peter’s Chimp Paradox, it seems we shut down the generous side of us, the genuine giving character and social character because we feel everyone/everything around us is taking a piece of us, or is a potential threat to our wealth, health, and welfare. It makes sense right?

However, tonight, meeting this adorable group of new people has shown me that despite life’s uneasiness, every one of us still values and indulges in intimate, genuine bonds of social interaction and friendship.

Simply put then, We all love good company and a good vibe on a weekend night out, don’t we?

So, you are not alone in your thinking; you are not alone in feeling the fear to put yourself out there; you are not alone in appreciating a good friend, a genuine exchange and getting to know new people.

Others appreciate them, but our world has just made it more difficult for people like you, me, and those with you on this journey, to be as genuine. So stick to what you value, and you will see how other will fall into your circle, appreciating, loving your attitude and thus revealing their exact same attitude to you because deep down, we long to be heard and appreciated by others, we really do.

We are all connected.

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We are all still looking for this now-rare “race” of people, this extinct species capable of carrying this positive vibe to the dinner table, this easiness to initiate conversations, exchange hilarious life incidents, or just this dancing-the-night away attitude, for the sake of a good time and a good, well-deserved laugh after a week(s) of hard work.

When we left tonight, this new group of people I spent the eve with were no longer strangers, but they also shared how “rare people like you are in this world these days [Joy].”

This was meant as a compliment and it touched me deeply; however, it is also at the same time not entirely true because my evening with them revealed there are still other people like Me in this world 🙂 We value the same interactions and simplicity in chats and fun!

I mean, who does not like to be at a dinner table and listen to jokes or funny stories and exchange his/hers? Who prefers to listen to nagging and whining and heart-breaking stories or to look at artificial people showing off all night?

Who does not like to make new friends? to share what they do and know with someone interested to listen?

Who does not like to feel a sense of security and trust amplified? Who does not enjoy exploring other people’s stories (hardship lessons or achievements’), hobbies, passions, and find someone whose hobby complements his or hers and can take it to further heights?

There is someone, many actually, like you in this world; they share these heart-felt needs to bond with people over simple fun, simple exchanges, simple goodness.

We just need to find each other, and the only way to do that, is you to open up, show a piece of your genuine self, not being scared, and see how magically others open up.

You are not the only human who appreciates this, or that, many others are like you, but the adversity in this world and the challenges to build a life amid current national and international developments is pushing you to lose  yourself, your giving,transparent self, and to bury yourself in your own cocoon, where you think nothing bad can happen there, when in reality, you yourself would be degrading, losing yourself, your goodness, kindness, your communication skills that make you a human being, a compassionate creature by nature.

Very truly yours,

Joy

March 12, 2017

She Got Engaged; I Learned to Be Her Second Line of Defense

My childhood best friend, E.G., got engaged 8 months ago today.

My post comes 8 months overdue, but it comes on an evening I found all my thoughts drifting towards her, her photos on social media with her partner, contemplating the life she’s built for herself.

My sister, Sadness, and I were dining together earlier this evening, when she told me,

Joy, you you, you have a way with words..no matter what you tell me, it does not surprise me because I know your words got you this, that, and there, they can get you anywhere.

So here I am using the thing i am apparently best at, to express my love, my heartfelt pride, and my happiness, to someone… SO DEAR, to my heart.

E.G is the most delicate human being you’ll ever meet, like a beautiful butterfly- literally.

She’s the most kind heart-ed being. She carries the innocence of a child; do not get me wrong though, life has taught her lots of things.

Her choice to get engaged comes from a fully grown lady, a lady I admire and cherish with all of my heart. I may have failed to show her this through actions, physical gestures, and social media “likes” and “hearts”.

But … deep down is where it all matters, isn’t it? All the feelings, all the thought, all what you wish someone?

I admire her, partly because she has the courage to love; a courage I sometimes doubt I have or know how to use. Do you?

I may have the courage to fight for my career, for my professional and personal growth and development, my survival from a dramatic accident and chronic injuries, but she…

She fought and lost many battles at love,

but she also won – a lot more than she ever lost, in my eyes at least.

Love breaks, in ways we each grew familiar with in our own ways, don’t you think?

Her story is a fairy tale, but there’s a catch:

to date, I do not know exactly how to feel having someone as dear be engaged. Some of you may think, it’s the cycle of life, nothing changes, it’s the normal thing that should have happened…

But, for those of you who like me, may think a bit further of this big step for someone like E.G.,who has had her share of right and wrong relationships, then I feel differently, and at one point I felt like I “had fallen out of her life”.

For instance, I keep feeling I should have done something: I should have been there, at the proposal, after the proposal; I should have brought that gift, or sent that card I never sent but i blame life for diverting our paths or putting in new people I barely know.. or maybe I even blame myself for having decided to travel for two years to pursue a masters, knowing she had something potentially serious going on, yet i couldn’t keep in touch in the same way we were..

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Life did put us on different paths, and sometimes, I think maybe I should have taken that extra mile every time i had the chance or time to stay in her life the same way we use to be, maybe then she wouldn’t feel disappointed of me or our friendship, or wonder where did we stop being that close in daily life.

But tonight, I see that those phone chats we share now and then, those occasional Sunday brunches, and those flawless memories we share from our childhood and in our innocent hearts still have us registered as the friends we use to be, exactly, and it’s all just more in my head.

As the day passed by today, I had a different take on life;

A little context for how i was inspired to post tonight:

I have been on a short unexpected period “off” work and this past week, I’ve been enjoying the little things, like

My mum, being with her to pray, to shop, to prepare lunch at home.. like

My Dad, his cuddling knowing that he is a stiff, solid Man;

my sister coming back from work, with the same drained and beaten look on her face only i am there to console her, listen to her, feed her, or just listen to her learning about low people, unprofessional and undeserving managers..

my workout, runs, and training at the gym and outdoors as they reminded me of how good i feel about myself once i accomplish those little training milestones.

Tonight, I finally realize I did not “fall out of E.G.’s life”, but out into her second line of defense

All relationships evolve, romances above all.

From a young married couple in their 20s and 30s, to their 80s or 70s, love alone or the flame does not survive, it’s rather the entire package, the respect, the admiration, the caring, the taking care of each other, the dreams and plans you see with your significant other, the interests you share or different tastes you experience because of each other..

[PS: For those of you with a richer experience on love than mine, please feel free to share your lesson in the comments sections: I for one would learn so much from you, really.]

So, if that is true and the package is the key, then i know with her getting engaged, life shifted my positions, in her life.

I need to allow life to make these changes, else i’d ruin its plans for my loved ones; i see now how i fell right into E.G.’s second line of defense.

I am no longer in the front row, enjoying a close up view, but rather sat on that balcony, where she owns the stage, she is its star, and she knows I am there and will be, whenever she signals it:)

Try not to jump into conclusions or allow your doubts or fear of losing a close one push you to move out of their life because they sure want you in it. At least, this is my lesson from E.G.

Being in second line of defense is in fact, key and crucial. If you are not there, who would protect her heart, which is initially inside, closer to your line than the first, cause who builds a fortress and sits outside of it? You’re that second line, that inner circle, not that outer layer. Enjoy it, see it, feel it, and act like it.

Keep your warm memories of you two, cherish the other’s adventures and love stories, be there for them as much as you can. As you do your best to do all these,  your dear one sees it or must see it one day – at least what i believe today, in this situation, with these thoughts, at my age of 27.

I know I count and I know how happy it makes me to see her so grown up; exactly my age she is.. but way ahead of me in the courage she has to love.

E.G., may the odds be forever in your favour. I love you.

Truly yours,

Joy

Feb.23, 2017 at 2.38am

It’s Happening, Yup, whilst you think “no:O, I’m Planning It”!

My most beautiful people:

I M.i.s.s. y.o.u :D<3 ; It’s “us” time!!

I have a zillion deadlines i need to meet as our summer semester in uni comes to closure; yet, it’s *us* time.

I need it, you do too, your emails, messaging, dropping by on my media and space signals me that. I can also feel you .. here’s one sign that i really truly do:

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I cannot believe i am here now, ditching all else, the life have-to-dos to be on here, feeling as amazing as i do, blogging, sharing a piece of my life with you- it’s been a while and i have so much.

I’ll try to divide them across a couple posts tonight, if you have the time, stay tuned and give me a chance at being your good company? I’d be delighted to have you ‘spend the eve in’, with you lot, the night before my birthday;)

PS :

My sis, Sadness, already thinks i’m growing more and more ‘spiritual’ and an out-of-this-world kind of being who lives in her own planet of positivity and kindness and allgoodthings, in my newly found habits, practices, feeling others, and chill-ness about almost everything and anything frustrating. So, now i’m sure she’d be thinking i’m going nut-tily emotional with virtual, imaginary friends of mine as she would tease about my blogging:OO hihi  (A)

But no worries,  i promise, i told her all about most of you, she knows you’re more real than anybody i know, yep, you: Deb, Tea, Robert, Steph, Ishita, Paardje, The Seeds for Life, madinplainsight … and all of you new followers i haven’t had the chance yet to really get to know you.

 

  • Cici (pronounced like, “sea-sea”):

I hadn’t seen a friend of mine in more than a year, until we met on Saturday July 30th 2016 at the phenomenal Engagement of one of our dearest, dearest friends from uni.

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We had lovely, refreshing, thought-provoking sharings and chats during the ride to the South of Lebanon on a Saturday eve to get ourselves to the much-awaited engagement;

we talked endlessly throughout the evening, until Cici said one thing that lit a light bulb in my head, it just stuck there until today, when I sat and actually blogged about it here to you.

 

So we were catching up .. on where life took us, in what directions, professionally, academically, socially, and intimately; from one convo to the next, and then she said so assertively and realistically,

“Yes it’s so true true .. Life is happening as we are planning[…]”

Ladies and Gents:

shouldn’t we live a little more? plan a little less?

because the time we’re using to “plan” how to make better use of our time and energy and life is actually time wasted from the now we live in? Isn’t it?

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Cici has been with her partner for the past 6.5 years, 7 in a month’s time. I asked, how did you get through, 7 years?! Wow, wow, i am truly amazed! Knowing- please: that for all that time, she’s been in Lebanon, while he’s in the USA (time difference is the least of their worries i’d bet!), building the brightest future he can see, for himself, his children, and wife to be. She was/is doing the exact same, developing herself and growing.

Tough call, huh?

We don’t always get it easy in life; we just don’t, it’s life, no problem though: each of us, each one, has their story, their very own, you’d know it and that more than anyone, won’t you? –

Ambitious though? Determined? Focused? Hell yes.

I don’t think I ever said that to her or her partner, knowing both are jewels in my life – but here’s my chance, finally having the courage so genuinely too, to post and announce it here to them:

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I admire the both of them, the courage, the persistence, the faith in life’s ways.. big time big time big time.

 

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I mean..getting over the sort of challenges they faced, and those are only the external challenges we saw or knew of !?

They have been more away from each other than together in the same geographic location really; but that night, she had breaking news:

Cici was accepted and fully funded for a PhD in the USA, when neither she nor her partner expected or planned for things to turn and work out that way.

Fate?

Grace?

Hard work and dedication over the long-term?

Will power?

Luck? … (*Add in your/more suggested words and thought here provoked by the couple’s story*)

This is where she said, life happens as we are planning or trying to plan it… 

Heat of the moment, I thought this was beautiful, it spurred in me a certain feeling i try to put for you in words here (so that’s me now talking to life at that exact time):

{You know what you’re doing , don’t you? Cici and her partner F.R. have been trying to plan, plan, and plan just a little more, hoping that actually being together in the same space would become real,

and there you wandered off, completely on your own, as they thought they were planning YOU! You little sneaky but beautiful surprise, you gave it to them, after 7 years, on a silver platter ( did not say Gold here as they will still be 3 hours apart by plane as i was told, hehe nonetheless :D:D!!) }

We just need to cease the opportunity(-ies); keep fidgeting; email, google, meet them others, inquire, be open to others, to people, to your dreams, ambitions, to idols you think are too high up the ladder to be reached.. let us be happy for them rather than be jealous.

Why Not?;

Why not be happy for others? deeply, truly, wholly, genuinely, with the good nature of a human being? We could be that, we all could, for jealousy does not bring you whatever it is you envy, does it? 

  • Selim and Nidale:

On July 28th, 2 days prior to the Engagement of our dear friend above in the pic, Mum and I went up to a home furniture and home décor, artisanal-oriented boutique, but one that sells, crafts, and/or ships very rare, unique pieces, most are hand-made, and not even manufactured anymore in their places of origin like this little pill box, hand-crafted:

Selim, the passionate owner of the boutique, has a passion for beautiful objects, and people, and it so happened i was with my mum that evening to buy an engagement gift, and he insisted i take this precious box home with me as a gift.

His wife Nidale, runs the shop with him; they live in the floor right above. #simplelife #fulloflove.

I have not seen – EVER- two  people who love each other as much as this couple; and their love story, oh boy, I’ll never forget it.

These two gems are 68 and 63 (respectively: Selim and Nidale).

In their youth, they were WILD, literally, WILD and YOUNG and FREE (yes just like the song indeed).

To their era, they were so open, as they dedicated their life, each on his/her own at first, to dancing. But, not any dancing: they represented LEBANON, their home country, in Canada, as they belonged to a folkloric dance studio.

Lebanese “Dabke (our traditional dance) was their passion, their LIFE.

They both left their family at a very early age, when their dance studio asked each of them, in his/her respective team, to join the one team summoning the studio’s elite dancers, to travel to Canada, to teach the Dabke tradition to expats: children, youth, adults, and elderly too!

They had never danced on the same team, but apparently, as uncle (‘3ammo’ is the equivalent Arabic term used to familiarize a stranger who is so friendly and warm like) Selim and aunty Nidale had ‘a thing’ from a distance, as they practiced with the dance group in Lebanon.

Life then intervenes, again, this time giving Selim and Nidale Love on a golden platter: the trip to Canada, the adventure and thrill of mingling with expats missing their home country so much, had lasted enough years (TEN!), which allowed both of them to marry, in Canada, as they both continued doing their own thing, pursuing their most sincere, authentic passion: Lebanese Dabke Dance.

They both then moved back to Lebanon, where they had 3 children, two of which live in Canada now, and one is in Lebanon.

(PS: To be true to you my people, i tried asking the couple for a photo, as they told me the story in the boutique they looked to gorgeous, heart-warming, and 3ammo Selim even flipped open his Nokia, old-fashioned signature phone to show me photos of his gorgeous bride ! Unfortunately yet so sweetly, aunty Nidale tells me,

Forgive me Dear but no photos tonight please, i have not done my hair, and Selim is not allowed to pose for any photos without me”.

Then, she went on to show me pictures on her antique mobile as well, of herself, when she was in her 20s, all pretty and dolled up, dancing her life out.)

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My heart melted; seeing them .. and how life worked its magic for 45 YEARS to-date.

You tell me, how does their story make you feel? (*sigh*:)

 

 

  • Tati and Santiago

In the same themes of this post: Life, Engagement event, Cici’s breaking news, being happy for others, giving…

I was at the farewell of Cici a week later from the Engagement. I had the chance to re-unite with some old uni mates, particularly a certain Tati.

She was with someone that night, a man i recognize only from her social media and timeline.. where i also knew she was struggling and has been for a while, to move mountains.. why? what? how?

Long story short, she is a Lebanese (non-European), trying to find a good job in Europe, enough said, don’t you think? The simple and really logical reality is, Europe today is looking after itself and itself only and mostly (especially post-2008 crisis), so it cannot really afford anymore, the opportunities and advantages it used to give to foreigners, like it did before.

Now, Tati and I got the chance to chat, she introduced me to Santiago, Mr.-mysterious on her social media 😉 He was absolutely adorable for one particular reason in my eyes:

the whole time, from the time of introduction to the time when we said goodbye at the end of the eve, Tati was all he talked, bragged, and smiled about. It was beautiful to watch them, truly.

Turns out,

  1. Them too were already engaged!
  2. On that farewell night, Tati had just gotten two job offers in Switzerland, not only that, but those offers would leave her only an hour away or less from her fiance!

Would you tell me about Life now? Would you give this story a Golden or silver, or perhaps bronze platter? 

🙂

I was genuinely thrilled, thrilled to see how life challenged them yes, but then to see how it so generously gave back to them, as they just gave more love and determination, will power, hard work, commitment, and love into each other’s lives..

Now, i thought of the flip-side too, honestly i did that night as i drove back home, listen:

Knowing the situation in Lebanon, growing more difficult economically and politically by the minute, i thought to myself:

how many friends of mine, acquaintances, have been struggling for years now with finding a decent post, salary, and life despite their good qualifications…

How do you think they, and even us sometimes, me included, would have looked at Tati and Santiago, Selim and Nidale, Cici and F.R., and/or many other ‘success stories’ similar to those in my life shared above, and they would just envy them, or maybe they just self-wondered, why do they get to get it all?

Why does it work out for them? or for one of them just like that?

‘Just like that’ is how we all see it, isn’t it?

We don’t see the entire iceberg when we look at people’s lives because all we see is that tip, that happiness that comes in at the end, and which is all people share in their lives really-

The Iceberg Illusion.jpg

Look at all the Facebook lives and Instagram accounts, Snap chat stories, and photos.

Does anyone take a photo of himself or herself when they’re in a depression, or crushed, or in their own shadows? Rarely, or for certain purposes, .. right?

Most of my Facebook has happy relationships, lives, smiles, family gatherings, achievements, awards and ceremonies, *sparkle times* as i love calling them:)

Ladies, or gents, a moment of truth tonight, I nakedly stand here and ask myself and You guys, my people:

How many times did you look at others, really, honestly, and thought to yourself:

Why are they achieving miracles?

devil and angel

And i’m still waiting on mine? ,

Why do they get this or that and that?,

While i remain stuck here and there for years? and i keep getting lost and then find myself, then find hope and then lose it to find it again as i struggle then overcome challenges then fight for my life and balance again, but then hit rock bottom before another incident knocks me down again?

…all whilst others seemingly are getting all they ever wished for, living La Vie en Rose !

tom and erry devils

We are humans,

And our mind goes on and on and on for ages, days, weeks and years sometimes, making us envious, making us think it has defeated us, when the truth is:

the mind has no power, it’s all in you and how much you give it and how you adjust your own sails you were equipped with from the day you were born.

It’s okay, i forgive myself for being egoistic sometimes, and i think you should too. I forgive even people closest to me sometimes, whom i look at in certain situations and I think to myself:

you know what, you are so full of yourself, why would you want to envy what others have achieved, or received, life is about giving NOT taking.

And when you give, really give, this is when things and blessings more specifically will flow back to you, ten folds! 

I’m actually reading an extraordinary Book now on “givers” in life v/s “takers” and “matchers” (these last try to find the balance between not giving so naively, and not being entirely arrogant or as self-centered as “takers”:

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{Adam Grant- Why helping others drives our success: Give and Take}

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Dedicated to all humans on this platform, who accept and admit their faults;

we admit we are not perfect, but we have our eye and hearts focused on the greater good, on that angel of ours rather than the devil on our shoulder.

Goodness is rare, it comes from within, and it can only be safeguarded by being the authentic you, true to yourself, the closest possible to the beautiful human you were created to be on this earth, in this life.

 

All my love,

Joy

Aug. 19, 2016; 7.32pm

 

 

 

 

 

Wake up Call

Hello my people,

I rushed to work early this morning, planning on staying ahead (on top) of any upcoming tasks/meetings/lessons etc., but then,

a short WatsAp message from a very very dear friend and mentor shared in the pic below, shook me up as in really woke me up to what i am/was doing in this life for the past year appprox.

I need you to read this as well, we are more alike than we can ever imagine, so this reminder may be yours as well as mine:

IMG_1542

He was my wake up call, for the upcoming year at least;

the reason today, i will come back to life:

I found my next plan in life, after a long time of ‘settling back home’ and into my new career path, and i have just taken my first ACTION towards it, as we speak.

I was scared of sharing my “plan” in life now, with others, i did only yesterday with my sister, but here i am today, having received my sign/this message..

I am aiming for the USA now, for another Masters and/or PhD in Public Policy, one of the most renowned universities and this here will hold me accountable to you- i need to tell you where I am when i am there. How about that?

This is huge to me at least, BIG. In my head, it’s a NO NO, you’ll never make it- you haven’t the money, the connections, the knowledge even – imagine how much i am doubting myself here! 

But now, i am not scared, every human being has a way of getting around things or going where they want to be, even if it’s to the same place i or you want to be.. so be it, I am doing this my way and the world has enough place for the all of Us, YES.

We all have dreams, and secret wishes, and aspirations, ambitions, tons of things we feel we will never reach, not in this life we say, no i can’t, it’s too far-fetched, others won’t let me, i am no genius, why would i make it… 

STOP, STOP! STOP these thoughts.

I share my urgent message here with you:

  1. How easy is it for us to dwell on the status quo especially in our professional life? – to me, VERY Easy to be honest, true, personal, current story.

2. How easily do we lose track of what we’re doing, forget the bigger picture, and find all our time, nights in , nights out, our energy, and focus, is being spent, surprisingly willingly, on a place or job or position we know we will not hold forever, or for the number of years or months to come – I have been ‘settling’, thinking I’m doing what i need to do for the past 7 months. I hate that i now realized this, but it’s okay.  IT’S NEVER EVER TOO LATE TO WAKE UP, TO DO THINGS THAT MATTER.

3. Why do we invest so much time on the wrong things and much less on the things that we KNOW will take us to where we want to be, to out utmost potential, to the best that we know we can be? –

the only person standing in front of your dreams, and/or making your current reality or transition rather seem that it is the permanent is YOU. 

yes, i have heard and read this far too many times, but today, i live and breathe it. today, may 23rd 2016 like never before.

I cannot emphasize it more this morning, I needed to “wake up”, to see that what i am doing now, i am grateful for yes indeed i am, but:

it’s a “stepping stone”, and a stepping stone is not supposed to pull me/us down; rather, it’s a step-push-UP for us, to reach for the higher grapes up on the vine.

 

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I went on a beautiful hike yesterday, only me and this nature. Perspective is what i gained, what counts and what does not, what i need to do, take a step back from my routine and then  lean into the actions i need to be the best that i can be – which is ALOT i am that confident.

I love you my people, for always listening, and sharing your thoughts through my good day email chain, or our  email correspondences, face to face, or my social media accounts.

You change my life and make my days, every day. I am thankful, forever.

Truly yours,

Joy.

May 23, 2016; 9am